So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize