Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
