Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize