I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Randomize
