it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
