i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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