I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She needs sedatives and a leash
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
