So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
