I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize