You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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