he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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