we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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