Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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