New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
