did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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