we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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