I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
