tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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