wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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