wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Randomize
