How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
