If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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