i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
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