it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
home. puking in laundry basket.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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