So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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