So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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