that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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