He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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