Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
