Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
