I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize