Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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