For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
