and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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