Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
