I hate all girls vehemently.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
