My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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