Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
