..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
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