i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Every concussion has its silver lining
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
