I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Text me some of your sweat
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
