No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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