Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
