That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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