Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
