Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
