question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
