i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
