im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
