Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize