we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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